Swing low sweet chariot

This sketch by Art Paine shows how a gimbaled berth would provide for level sleeping comfort, regardless of the forces affecting the heel of the boat. Drawing by Art Paine

Spring 2024

By Christopher Birch

Back to the future. Again.

I’ve been gazing into the future of yachting and my crystal ball has seen a snow-globe flurry of action lately. My time travel has taken me to the 2026 Eagle Seven Sailing Yacht Design Awards gala, where I marveled over the imagined bronze medal winner, “Boom Boom Solar” (Points East, Dec. ’23), and the silver medal winner of tomorrow, “Tender is My Transom Yachts” (Points East, Winter ’24). Now the time has come to unveil the future gold medal winner of the 2026 ESSYDA contest: Chuck Paine.

Have you ever wished that yacht designers cared as much about sleeping comfort as they do about a kettle’s boiling safety? Well, Chuck Paine does! He’s designed a bunk that gimbals just like the stove in your boat’s galley gimbals. Chuck’s twin brother, Art, sketched out the idea in the drawing you see above.

This self-leveling bunk is a unique feature of Chuck’s very real 36-foot sloop design named “Expannie.” (An expanded version of his earlier 30-foot “Annie” design.) In my dreamscape plans for this new boat sit collecting dust for a while until a boat builder of the future, Sweet Chariot Yachts, recognizes the brilliance of the design and puts the boat into production. Hull #1 takes the sailing world by storm, and she quickly makes her way to the top of the awards podium.

The gimbaled bunks are not the only strength of this design, but they are an intriguing feature. Sally, my imagined friend at Sweet Chariot, explains, “The Paine Bunk is no bed of nails. Despite the name, this bunk is the opposite of masochism. It’s an onboard oasis where the off-watch crew can rest in horizontal comfort even when the boat’s rolling motion is dipping the horizon from rail to rail.”

Wow! Do I ever see the value in this! Rolling when underway, or at anchor, is the archnemesis of sleep. To get the upper hand and beat back the roll would be a huge maritime victory, a battle not even John Paul nor Davey Jones ever won.

Sure, hammocks have been aboard boats forever. The hammock is a funny thing though; I find it blissfully comfortable for about 10 minutes and then suddenly misery sets in. I’m not exactly sure why. Maybe it’s because just when I decide I want to roll over onto my side, I discover I can’t. Or maybe it’s because I’m not a banana and I like to sleep on something flat. Or maybe it’s because I don’t feel fit and ready for the day waking up with a cross-hatched net pattern welted into my cheek and the back of my leg. Besides, hammocks are next to impossible to get in and out of on solid ground, and I can’t imagine things would get any easier on a moving boat. The Paine Bunk takes the best from both worlds: the gimbal provided by the hammock, and the proper flat mattress provided by a standard bunk.

Just like the galley stove, the bunk can be locked to provide a stable platform to load yourself in and out of. The locked position might also be preferable for those flat nights on anchor. Or the bunk could be set free for that lazy porch swing effect even when gimbaling isn’t required. There’s nothing homier or comforting than bringing a little slice of Americana out to sea with you. And nothing says Americana as emphatically as the porch swing.

The pair of amidship gimbaled bunks are only one component of this well-thought-out yacht. Like most Chuck Paine designs, the Expannie is a great sea boat designed for blue water work. A sturdy, masthead sloop rig provides the power. Under the water she sports a full keel with a cutaway forefoot. Her externally mounted and tiller-steered rudder delivers a traditional look and feel. A full flow aperture coupled with light carbon fiber rudder construction brings modern efficiency to the underbody. The boat should track like a train and provide a comfortable motion at sea. At 36-feet LOA, she’s the Goldilocks size for shorthanded offshore voyaging. Rig and aperture aside, her lines remind me of a scaled-up version of a Herreshoff 12 1/2 and I bet she sails just as well.

Chuck designed this boat for his planned retirement voyage to distant seas. An entire career’s worth of learning and evolution within the mind of one of the world’s great naval architects underpins this design. An ill-timed recession got in the way and the boat was never built, and Chuck’s retirement cruise remains on hold. Then, according to my crystal ball, along comes new boatbuilder Sweet Chariot Yachts and the Expannie swings from dream towards reality.

Like many of the other boat builders that Chuck has chosen to associate his name with, Sweet Chariot Yachts will utilize proud Maine craftsmanship and build to the highest possible quality standards. Distant seas await and the prudent sailor will get their order in ASAP. Maybe you’ll even be able to trade tacks with Captain Paine on the long run from Panama to French Polynesia – sleeping like a baby on a flat bunk all the while.

Well, time travel has been an adventure, but now that all the awards have been given out, it’s time for me to get back to the present day. The Boom Boom Solar sail cover is a great idea just waiting for some energetic person to sew it together. If you’re that person, go for it, and be sure to send me a photo. (No rights reserved.) Or maybe you’re destined to be the founder of Tender Is My Transom Yachts, happily whiling away the next decade or two building nesting boats. Have at it. (Trademark not pending.) Or maybe it’s the Expannie with her gimbaling bunks and far away dreams that appeals most. Chuck Paine has the plans for that one at the ready; all you have to do is call him and start the conversation. Once you have the venture underway, please let me know the address of the Sweet Chariot Yachts building shed, as I’d like to swing by and admire your progress.

Christopher “Shark Tank” Birch is the founder of Birch Marine Inc. on Long Wharf, Boston. He is now out cruising full-time with his wife, Alex, aboard their 36-foot Morris Justine. Follow their voyage at EagleSevenSailing.com.